With just 23 days to go, I can fully admit the anxiety/excitement is almost at its peak! It's strange because I've had these feelings before in my life, just in a completely different context. The excitement part is something I haven't felt since I was a kid! To the point that I recently texted Brandon to tell him, "I'm getting first-day-of-school chills. I haven't felt that in years." Pretty incredible if you ask me.
Despite living in New York City on and off for four years, this trip will, by far, be the longest I will have ever been away from home, and Brandon as well. Being in NYC was stressful, but I had work to do there. And home was only an 8 hour bus ride away. Once we land in SE Asia, we are in it for the long haul. We will even be away for Christmas; something I never thought I'd ever have a good enough reason to do. I hate that I'm so hard-wired like this, but I'm even experiencing a little bit of stress knowing I won't have work to do. In my rational mind, I know I should be thanking the universe for this amazing opportunity, but my irrational mind is so excited to have this blog to focus on ("work"). Backwards, I know, but being a hustling workaholic has given me a lot of good in my life, so I'll trust that it's not entirely a bad thing.
To ease the anxiety (and continue to amp up the excitement) I've been doing a lot of research: reading travel blogs, watching videos, etc. I'm learning a lot and I feel a lot more prepared for what we're setting out for. I've only allowed myself to dig so deep to make sure I'm seeing things with my own eyes and with not too many preconceived notions.
I also find when I get stressed, I go back to the initial inspirations, and the reasons I said yes. I do this in my everyday life too. Everyone has gotten to points in a process, whether at work or at home, where they say to themselves, "What the hell did I get myself into?" I try to consistently remind myself of the reasons I get involved in things, or make certain choices. It's important to tap into that original thought process and then reevaluate.
For me, this trip goes way back. Brandon and I knew we always wanted to take an extended trip (something more than the 2-4 weeks allotted in the American corporate world). A series of different things helped us land on this particular location of the world, at this particular time, but overall, it was accomplishing a goal we were dead set on.
I distinctly remember a day at my last job, sometime in mid-2013. I had just taken a 10-day trip to Europe to visit my little sister who was studying abroad. I was chatting with a co-worker via our inter-office messaging system (slacking off). I lamented that I had just used up the majority of my vacation time for the year. I sent him these two videos below. It was pretty much that day that I decided sooner or later, a trip like the one I'm about to embark on, was going to happen. And here we are. And I'm feeling better already....
"Make it Count" by Casey Neistat
"I Could Be the One" Avicii vs Nicky Romero